Bad days. Even the best of us have ’em. Sometimes a perfectly normal day with lots of potential for awesomeness suddenly turns into a crappy day, for no apparent reason. Something seemingly insignificant tips us over the edge inside: Husband commenting on your hairy arms. Kid asking one too many times for the iPad. Favorite yoga pants revealing a developing muffin-top.
Then, of course, there are also those days that are crappy for more obvious reasons: A fight. A break-up. Losing a job. Or, God forbid, a family tragedy. Whether caused by serious events or stupid ones, those less-than-ideal days are bound to happen. Resilience, a key to making it through even the sh*ttiest of days, is necessary and can be developed (great news!). But that is a more in-depth topic for another day. Really, it deserves its own post, and now you have something else to look forward to.
Let’s talk about the “typical” crappy day we moms are more likely to experience. Like yesterday, for me. I had a crummy day, for totally silly reasons. I knew what to do to get out of my funk, but still allowed myself to sulk in my crappy feelings, playing a marathon of rom-coms in the background while feeling sorry for myself about my sleepless week and unmotivated disposition. I let this shenanigans continue until about 4:30pm, at which point I felt the climax of the day’s feelings culminate into one single thought:
“I’ve wasted this entire day.”
Now, for some, this may not seem like such a big deal. But for those of us who are ultra type-A, like to get stuff done, and feel generally happier when we’ve been more intentional about our day, it’s a sucker punch to the gut. I didn’t regret that I hadn’t done any work that day. I intended to take a day off.
I did regret half-assing my time with my kids. I regretted not being more engaged with them, when I had a day-long opportunity of doing so. I regretted being such a downer that I even brought them down. I regretted losing it in front of the neighbor kids (more on that in an upcoming Confessions post). I regretted that I didn’t at least clean some kitchen countertops or vacuum or something!
What the hell had I been doing? I’ll tell you what I’d been doing. I’d been letting whatever little situations arose to pull my emotions around in all sorts of directions. I was intentional about nothing, and that feeling SUCKS.
It’d been such a long time since I’d fully experienced this sucky feeling. I recognized it. I sat with it. I looked it in the eye, and had a metaphorical stare-down. I decided the day’s not over yet, dang it, and there’s still time to turn this thing around!
How did I do it? Fine, OK–I’ll share my secrets with you. They just may be pretty spectacular for you, too, next time you have a sh*tty day. Try these four things to turn that frown upside down, without having to fake it til you make it.
1. Listen to Some Tony Robbins
There’s nothing like a little in-your-face #realtalk about getting a grip on your emotions to put you in your place. Talk about a kick in the butt. I personally like Mr. Robbins’ candid, out-of-the-box style, but if he’s a little to brash or abrasive (or loud) for you, consider TED talks, Oprah, Wayne Dyer, Marie Forleo, or Jim Rohn. There are so many incredible, motivating people to gleam inspiration from, who can help get your mind focused on the things that matter. I can give you a whole list (comment if you’re interested in more). If you have access to this post, you probably have access to YouTube. There’s a wealth of information and inspiration just waiting to be gobbled up. Go get you some!
2. Eat Something Delicious
Speaking of gobbling up…doesn’t eating something delicious always make things a little better? Go get you something delicious, and eat it. A juicy steak. A yummy, relaxing cup of tea. A piece of cake with extra frosting (now we’re talkin’!). Yesterday I did steps 1 and 2 simultaneously. I hid out in my car after grocery shopping sans kids, watching one of Tony’s seminars on my iPhone while eating a cinnamon roll with cream cheese frosting (shhhhhh). I call that trip to Ralph’s a success. The next two steps you can’t exactly do in a grocery store parking lot (or at least, shouldn’t), but by now, you’re well on your way to turning that sh*tty day around!
3. Wash Your Hair
Really, do it. You and I both know it’s been too long since you had an honest-to-God good hair-washing. You owe it to yourself. While you’re at it, paint your nails and shave your legs (above the knee), and tell me you don’t feel like a new woman!
4. Dance Around Naked
Look, you may as well do it at this point. You just took a shower, your hair is fresh and fabulous, and your legs sport no stubble; so turn on “Man! I Feel Like A Woman” and go for it, already!
If you’re crunched on time and can’t possibly dedicate time to each step because, well, #momlife? No problem…you can consolidate! Here’s what you do.
Get your phone. Grab your delicious food (or drink) item. Get your razor and shaving cream. Turn the shower on and your speakers up. Now soak up that Tony motivation while you sip your wine (er, tea) and wash your hair. If you have time, and more wine (TEA!), you shave those legs, mama. You may need to skip the nail-painting bit, but whatever. Turn on your music and dance around naked after drying off (the order of this is very important…), and viola! You’ve just done it. You’ve turned a sh*tty day around like a pro.
Go ahead. Try it. I’m telling you, by the time I get to step four, I’m a bubbly, feisty little creature again. At the end of the day, my inquisitive husband asked me what turned things around. I simply replied:
“I went to Ralph’s.”